Madonna reflects on the loss of her mother in an emotional Mother’s Day post

Madonna remembers losing her mother when she was 5 years old emotional post on Mother’s Day Sunday.

The mother of the Queen of Pop, after whom she was named, died of breast cancer in December 1963 at the age of 30.

Madonna started her Instagram carousel with a photo of herself performing on her recently concluded Celebration Tour, looking at a photo of her late mother on the big screen.

“I was standing on the stage [sic] for 81 performances she stared at my mother’s beautiful face and wondered what she must have been thinking when she waved goodbye to me from the hospital window,” the 65-year-old singer captioned the post. “I got into the station wagon and closed the door, not knowing that was the last time I would see her.”

Madonna continued: “No one told me my mother was dying – I just watched her mysteriously fall apart and then she disappeared and there was no explanation except that she had gone to sleep, which explains My turbulent relationship with sleep.”

However, she noted, “Tonight all my children are sleeping under one roof, which is rare and comforting.”

The Grammy winner admitted that “it’s hard for her to be separated from her six children – daughter Lourdes Leon (27), son Rocco Ritchie (23), son David Banda (18), daughter Chifundo “Mercy” James (18) and twin daughters Stella. and Estere Ciccone, 11 – “are growing up too fast and going in different directions.”

She continued, “When I walked on stage every night and looked into my mother’s face, I said hello and goodbye. I said: Thank you. I hope you’re proud of me. I said: Please protect me and keep me sane.

Among the photos in her slideshow was a photo of her on the same stage, staring at a photo of David’s biological mother, Malita, on the screen behind her. She said she had “the same thoughts”.

“Did I do my job well? Is she proud of her Son? Am I the mother she wants me to be?” – Madonna wondered.

The superstar, whose children have joined her both on tour and on stage, explained: “I have become very close to my children on this tour. We clung to each other. We worked and struggled for long hours. They helped me make my dreams come true. In chaos and storms. Monotony and repetition. Sleepless nights and endless packing and unpacking. All the sacrifices we made together. So many hours of blood sweat and tears.”

She said that while she and her offspring “were grateful for the privilege of bringing people together with music,” they “also just wanted to get laid.”

“Rocco painted along the way. Lola wrote songs. David and Mercy graduated from high school!” – she gushed.

Reflecting on motherhood, Madonna stated that “there is no easy way into the game of motherhood. No textbook or university. Just trial and error, learn, succeed, then fail again. Finally knowing that they are raising me, not the other way around.

She added: “I always laugh with my friends and say that motherhood = suffering. But this is not a joke. that’s the truest thing i’ve ever said. But I wouldn’t trade it for anything else.”